If I Could Just See You
by SmokeyTV
Summary: Nick tells what happened between the time we saw him say goodbye to Warrick at the diner and when we saw him sitting in the alley after Warrick was killed.


**This story was written for the fifth installment of the Talk CSI Nick Fic Song Challenge. The inspiration was the song, Storm, written by Jason Wade and performed by Lifehouse. **

**

* * *

**

If I Could Just See You

_If I could just see you_

_Everything will be alright_

_If I see you_

_The storminess will turn to light_

_…and everything will be alright_

"The damn waitress," Nick said. "That's what people keep saying. 'Well, Nick was still at the restaurant, right? Talking to that waitress.'" He looked up plaintively. "I wasn't. Even though…that's what he said to me…almost the _last_ thing he said to me… 'I think you need to take a hard look at that redhead'. But he was just kidding around 'cause he saw me checking her out. Shit, she's too young for me. I mean, I like to look, you know? I like the attention. Hell, what guy starting to get a little grey around the temples doesn't?"

Nick sighed and leaned back into the soft cushions of the couch he was sitting on. "But..." He shook his head. "Jesus, I didn't stay for that. I asked him to go out with me for a beer. He said no, though, and left. I told him I'd call him later. I just hung around to finish up my coffee. Everyone else left, he left…it was late, but it's not like it's a dangerous neighborhood or anything. The place was full of cops. It shouldn't have been…I mean…damn it. I guess that didn't matter, huh? Asshole could have walked right in and nobody would have blinked an eye." He leaned his head back and looked at the ceiling for a moment before continuing.

"So yeah...Warrick picked up the tab, you know? But I was gonna get the tip, so I was standing there figuring out how much to leave. I saw a couple of cruisers speed by, lights on, no sirens. Didn't think anything of it really. I dropped a ten on the table and started to leave. She called out after me…said to come back soon. I heard sirens and looked back out the window…saw an ambulance go by…still…I didn't think…I don't know." He shook his head and took a deep breath before continuing.

"I went out to go to my car, and I saw the red and blue lights flashing from the alleyway. There was a cruiser with an officer by it blocking the entrance to the alley…looked like Dan Schuler, so I…I walked over there to ask him what was up. I got closer, and man…he looked like shit…like maybe he was gonna puke or something. Then he saw me coming and…and…I thought he was gonna cry. I was like…what the fuck? What's going on? He said he didn't know they'd called me." Nick looked up. "When I told him that no one had called…that I was just heading home…well, then he looked _really_ sick. I asked him what was going on, and he just…he tried to say something but couldn't, and then he was just shaking his head."

Nick leaned forward on the couch, his elbows on his knees. "So that's when I looked down the alley. I saw more cop cars at the other end, and there was an ambulance in the middle. Then…I saw it. Right there. I saw his car." He put his head in his hands briefly before taking a deep breath and raising it again. "It was sitting there with both doors open and the driver's side window shattered. I looked over at Schuler and he wouldn't look at me…had his head down. I ducked under the tape and headed down the alley. I saw Brass coming toward me…he was saying something, but…I didn't hear him. I was looking for Warrick, but I didn't see him anywhere. 'Who'd he shoot? Who'd he shoot?' I kept asking Brass, but he wouldn't answer me…kept trying to keep me from getting any closer." He shook his head and laughed a little. "Only me, right? Only idiot look-on-the-bright-side Nick Stokes would see that scene and think _Warrick_ was the shooter."

Nick looked down at his hands which had started to shake. He clasped them together tightly and went on. "I saw the ambulance leave and pull out the other end of the alley…no sirens or anything. That can't be good, right?" He laughed a little to himself, but his eyes, full of tears, betrayed him. "After it moved, I saw the sheet on the ground by the car. It was bloody…there was a body under it. Then I saw Grissom and I was like, why's he here? He left before Warrick did. What's going on? Somebody tell me what the fuck's going on! And where was Warrick anyway? Grissom walked over to us and there was blood all over him. He looked like he was in shock. He didn't say anything. He just looked at me and then at the sheet…the body…on the ground."

The tears were coming now, hard and fast, as Nick continued, barely coherent, "I asked Brass again… 'Who'd he shoot? Who is that?!' He was holding onto my arms and trying to say something…but I wasn't listening, and Grissom…Grissom just kept looking at that damned sheet!" He looked up at the ceiling again, trying to compose himself. "Fuck…I knew…I knew…but I didn't want to believe it, you know? God…I wanted so bad to see Warrick come walking up. Brass sat me down on this little wall there off to the side…he knelt down in front of me…kept saying, 'Nick…Nick…', but I didn't want to hear what he was going to say." Nick looked up. "He said it anyway…he said, 'It's him'."

Then, just as he had done in that moment six months ago, Nick sat up straight, wiped the tears from his face, and set his jaw. "So that's it. Nothing I could do. What's done is done, right? Catherine came along and she broke down, but…but I just quit feeling anything. I just focused on getting the guy…nothing else. Then that was done, and it was over. Everyone moved on. You know, people have been telling me that my whole life. 'It's over'. How come it never is? How come it's never over for _me_?"


End file.
